Happy Earth Day- peoples



It is a hot, dusty world.
A dusty- hot world that is getting more dusty and more hotter every year. (Except for the last decade, which was a little cooler.)
The desert tortoise use to stroll across the American deserts with pride. Today, you would have more luck getting a date with Angelina Jolie then hitting a desert tortoise with your car.
Why..??
In 1999, when DEMOCRATIC President Bill Clinton was in office, the desert tortoise population was sky high in the Red Cliff Desert Preserve with 3,200.
But in the year 2000, when REPUBLICAN President Bush took office, the number of tortoises began to drop. Today, there are only 1,700 to be found.
Why would the turtles start kicking the bucket the minute a republican enters the White House..??
There can only be two reasons:
Humans are evil.
And...
Turtles are mostly democratic, and almost never vote republican.
What can save these poor desert creatures..??
Food..??
Education..?? (Education for the stupid humans, not the turtles.)
Answer- High taxation.
Democrats agree- Higher taxes will save the desert tortoise.
High taxes will save the earth..!!
Evil conservatives are NOT willing to pay higher taxes to save the desert tortoise, or the earth.

So, evil conservatives will not be helping us save the earth (or the turtles.)

People all over the world, to celebrate Earth Day, will be turning their lights out and sitting in the dark for one hour.

Now, there is no reason why you have to just sit in the dark for one hour and do nothing. Here at The Angry Republic, we have compiled a list of things that you can do with no electricity.



First- you are going to need candles. Do not use regular candles because of the pollution that is caused in the making of regular candles.

Get in your car and drive about 100 miles to "Bubba’s Recycled Candles." Bubba’s candles are made of 100% recycled wax. Bubba uses old toilet gasket wax to make his candles. (It has a very pungent aroma- Bubba’s toilet wax candles are: "earthy.")




Now that you have your "earthy" candles burning on "earth day", you are going to need some type of activity to occupy one hour of time.

SEX- is out of the question...

SEX- can create babies...

Babies smell bad, they are expensive, and babies grow up and KILL the earth.

PLUS, sex only lasts 2 minutes. (If you "do it right"), and you have an entire hour to fill.

Might we suggest a game of Yahtzee or Go Fish..??

This is a GREAT form of family entertainment, however, if you are spending "earth day" alone, it might be hard to play with yourself.

Might we suggest- meditation.



Meditation is a GREAT way to get in touch with your "inter-self."

You can meditate on why you are such a selfish bastard for destroying the earth. "What has the earth ever done to you..??"

The earth just sits there, spinning- like a mentally confused dog.

And you have the gull to spit, puke, and pour carbon gas on mother earth..??

OK- maybe you are NOT ready for meditation.

How about a good old fashion BBQ..??

Now, I know what you are thinking...

How can using a propane grill be environmentally good..??

Well, you are NOT going to be using a "propane grill."

Jump into you car and drive 100 miles to "Bubba’s Recycled Candles." Bubba sells 100% methane BBQ grills.




These grills are 100% environmentally safe because they burn methane gas. (Cow flatulence.)

You are NOT going to want to cook up some kind of animal meat on your new grill, because that isn’t any good for the earth.

Might we suggest some form of tofu or soybean steaks..??

"Fake- Steaks" are GREAT for the earth and you will feel good while you are cooking "fake steaks" over your methane (cow flatulence) grill.



Or maybe you would prefer to do nothing.

Maybe you could rap yourself in a "Snuggie" blanket and stare blindly out the window?



Whatever it is that choose to do with your "one hour- without power," remember to think about the earth.

The Earth- that cute little blue ball filled with metal- melting magma.

Hot magma- hot enough to burn the hair off of your backside.

So, start saving the earth..!!

Turn out those lights at 8:30pm.

Fire up your methane grill and your toilet wax candles.

Put on your "Snuggie" blanket and meditate on how much of an ass you have been.

The Earth thanks you..!!

The Angry Republican

Video Broadcast

Global Warming MUST be true. (Unless it isn’t)




Sections of this editorial were published before, on: April 2009 and May 2008.


I welcome all former democrats now joining us

I welcome all former democrats now joining us

Photobucket

Democrat Congressman Alan Grayson, (who was featured in our SPOOKY Halloween editorial last year) happened to go walking into a Tea Party rally, recently. (Hijinks and mayhem ensue, including a video.)

Tom Tillison, a member of a Florida Tea Party, asked Rep. Grayson a question: “These people are your constituents, don’t you feel that you owe them an explanation of your recent votes?”

To which, Rep. Grayson replied: “I don’t owe them anything, they are trying to defeat me.”

Photobucket

“You are a US Congressman and you approach these people acting like a thug.” Tillison offered.

Grayson’s reply was...

“They are attacking me. There are 308 million people who pay my salary. Do you know what that breaks down to- per person? Pennies on the dollar.”

Grayson added...

“I took a pay cut when I took this job.”

Congressman Grayson: yes, your paycheck may come from the federal government. However, your boss is every person who lives in that Florida District that YOU (are supposed to) represent. Not the people who live in California, nor the people who live in New York City, these people are not your boss. Your employer is those people who were in that Tea Party room and they have a right to try and remove you.

The MOST telling line of all was when Grayson said: “I took a pay cut when I took this job.”

WHEN I TOOK THIS JOB.

No congressman, you did not TAKE that job, like you would except a job as a plumber, or an accountant. No sir, you have very much lost your way.

You RAN for office. You promised the people in your district that you would listen to them and represent them in Washington DC.

Sir, you did not “TAKE” the job of congressman. You BEGGED the people of Florida to vote for you.

The approval rating for congress is at its lowest level since 1992. However, we could beat that 1992 record if congressmen, like Grayson, continue to disrespect the people in their district.

Photobucket

It has been fashionable to blame President Bush for everything, however; those days are numbered.

Photobucket

Every American understands that congress has been held by the democrats since 2006. During this 4 year rule of democrats in congress, we have seen the worst economy since the Great Depression, unemployment hovering near double digits, and an over-all GLOOM about the future of America that I haven’t seen since the 1970's and President Carter.

Sure, you can blame President Bush and the republicans for their share of this- gloom, and the American people fired republican based President’s and hired Barack Obama. Yet, it’s been over a year and things do not seem much better.

Hmmm, who else is STILL around today, who was there in 2006? What group of politicians still hold power in DC, who watched as the American economy went into the toilet and did nothing to warn us, or stop it?

Oh..Yea..!! The democrat controlled congress.

The American people are about to FIRE the democrat controlled congress.

Photobucket

Computer search engines are a funny thing. If you do a search on: “Republican registration up”, you will get a hundred stories on how the democrats are leading republicans in voter registration. However, most of these stories are from 2009 and 2008. Lost in the middle of these left-leaning, one-year old links, are a few current stories like this, from Panama City:

“..More people are switching registration from Democrat to Republican this month, albeit not in droves. Out of 44 registration changes from March 19-26, 28 were people changing from Democrat to Republican; the next most popular switch was Democrat to no party affiliation, five. No one switched from Republican to Democrat. The remaining 11 switched to or from minor parties..”

In Ohio and Pennsylvania, we are seeing about the same thing. Small news stories about democrats switching to republicans, and these stories are being buried. No one is covering these stories.

So, I wanted to take a moment and welcome all the former democrats to our side. I am glad that you made the switch. However, you will need to be “de-brainwashed.”

First off, you MUST get rid of the “guilt.”

Yes, guilt.

My friend, you work very hard. You give to charity when you can afford it. You help people if in need. You pay your fair-share of the taxes and try not to ask anyone to pay for your way. You have nothing to feel guilty about.

Yes, I’m afraid that you fell for the oldest trick in the book. A political party, (the democrats) use GUILT as a way to get your vote. They use guilt to grow the size of government, and they will use guilt to raise taxes.

Photobucket

Guilt is the “tool” that democrats use to make you become a “tool”.

Democrats will use GUILT to claim that:

We must raise taxes to save the earth. (Yet you know that higher taxes will not shut down one smoky factory, or save one polar bear.)

We must raise taxes so that our children receive a better education. (Yet you see schools closing in your area because they do not have enough students. Where the hell is the money going?)

Photobucket

We must raise taxes to deal with immigration. (Yet, you remember that congress and President Bush passed a law and set aside funding to do just that several years ago. What happened..??)

So, I welcome all of the former democrats joining us today. You will receive no ill-will from me. We all see the light at different times in our lives and I am grateful that you are crossing over NOW, as opposed to three years from now.

Fight the power.

It is time to send the democrat congress to the unemployment line.

Photobucket

Photobucket

Modern America and Religion

Modern America and Religion

Photobucket

This Easter weekend, I wanted to revisit a topic that I talked about last year. “How is religion holding up in this modern world?”

Do people “persecute” the modern believer?

Photobucket

Do you feel ashamed to tell people that you believe in God?

Are you torn between religion and science?

I try and tackle these and other topics in my editorial called: “Religion in Modern America.”

Photobucket

I have several ways in which you can view this editorial:

(One) You can read the editorial by clicking the link below.

Click here to READ my editorial on “Religion in Modern America”

(Two) The Audio File- I will read the editorial for you, and you are free to do other things, or even visit other sites while the audio file plays (NOTE- open a new window to view other sites.) Below, you will see a link, (or some of you will already see an audio player) just click the link and you will be taken to my audio player. When you see the audio player, just click play button (black triangle) next to the file called: “Audio File number 2- Religion in Modern America.” The audio file will begin to play and you can adjust the volume to your liking, also you can head to other sites in a new window.



(Or, you could do both. Listen to me read the editorial while following along with me and the written word. You can see how many mistakes I make.)

(Three) you could skip all of that and just tell me how you feel about religion in the modern world, in the comment section below, and we will talk about it.

Hey, I try my best to provide you with an easy way to read, or hear, (or SKIP reading and hearing) my editorials.

I hope all of you will have a GREAT Easter weekend.

Photobucket

(Note) If you skipped reading or hearing my editorial, (shame on you) however, you are still welcome to comment; here are the basic questions I cover:

Do people “persecute” the modern believer?

Do you feel ashamed to tell people that you believe in God?

Are you torn between religion and science?

Thanks for reading

The Angry Republic